Cutting Excess from Your Life, Changing Your Center

How often in our lives do we start collecting things and identifying with them? It may start with “that purse” or the trendiest new electronic device. Yet no matter how it begins, if we aren’t careful, the things we own begin to own us. And that, of course, does not equal happiness. But if we return to our core and rediscover life’s true meanings, we can break free and find our true selves.

Debuting on June 9, VH1’s new show “You’re Cut Off” deals with this very theme. Airing Wednesday nights for two months, “You’re Cut Off” is part of the stations 40 program line-up that will attempt to redefine Reality TV – making it inspirational, and building up individuals rather than tearing them down.

Arriving with 9 bags of luggage, my daughter, Erica Rose, joined eight other attractive and “entitled” young women with BIG attitudes to film the show for two months. Believing they were to appear on a show entitled “The Good Life,” Erica and the other girls expected to be housed in luxury to be given personal time for other commitments and a sizable salary to shop. But arriving in LA, they found a different reality.

Financially, I “cut off” Erica so that she could learn life’s true meaning. And under the direction of life coach Laura Baron, the nine young women did more than downsize - they embarked on a journey to find out why they had identified with a lifestyle, rather than who they were inside. During the experience, they mowed the lawn, shopped for groceries on a budget (less than $15 dollars a day per person), made the beds, did charity work and cleaned the house. A graduate student at the University of Houston, Erica continued her legal studies in her “free time,” in the wee morning hours.

The year after her graduation from Emory University, Erica appeared on “The Bachelor Rome” where she achieved some sort of celebrity. A major in creative writing and drama, Erica jumped on board when ABC began the national search for bachelorettes. Knowing from the begining that “spoiled” would be her strategy, she implemented it well. Never-the-less, ultimately she did not come home with a rose.

From time to time, we can all benefit from a refresher in the lessons of “You’re Cut Off.” Here is what Erica has learned so far:

1.   No one can take away your accomplisments.

2.   Income and the items you own have nothing to do with manners and class.

3.   Cleaning up after yourself is rewarding.

4.  Love your insides. When you know who you are, the insults of others will have less meaning. 

5.  Get the best education possible.

6.   Always try to help others.

7. If someone picks on you, remember that it is not always about you.

8.   Learn to live with fewer things. Love is free; share it with a smile.

9.   Use words and education, not muscles to fight your battles.

10.  Keep spirituality and religion in your life; faith can get you through any crisis.

The year after her graduation from Emory University, Erica appeared on “The Bachelor Rome” where she achieved some sort of celebrity. A major in creative writing and drama, Erica jumped on board when ABC began the national search for bachelorettes. Knowing from the beginning that “spoiled” would be her strategy, she implemented it well. Never-the-less, ultimately she did not come home with a rose.

But, the truth is, most of us spoil our children. We must remember that the most important gifts we can give are love, education, a safe environment and an open heart. From anger to love and from fights to friendship, see the girls be without luxury on “You’re Cut Off.” This summer, let Wednesday nights on VH1 help you cut out the excess and build your self-esteem instead.